There is a huge difference between ‘Actually Needed’ Relationship Goals and the Relationship Goals you see most of the time on social media. To be honest, they’re not even realistic – they are just the sickeningly exaggerated versions of the real goals. Like pictures of happy couples holding hands and walking on the beach or cuddling or watching movies together is okay; that is like completely acceptable. But cuddling in positions that are extremely uncomfortable or something is just a dramatic declaration of love that is completely over the top.
What’s weird is that relationship goals like these are getting all the attention and are being shared at an extremely fast pace over the social media. My guess is that couples do this to get attention and internet fame – that might sound cynical, but that is the truth. Nowadays people want to look like Goals rather than actually be Goals.
Like nothing in this world is perfect, no relationship can be perfect too. But it isn’t about perfection; it’s about being happy. And I don’t think posting paragraphs on Facebook or something similar we see happening lately is going to make you happy. That being said, here are some things that can actually be known as Relationship Goals. And these are some things that you might want to strive for if you genuinely want to have a happy relationship.
1- Hearing Your Partner’s Phone Ring And Not Feeling The Immediate Urge To Check It
It’s okay being nervous about what your partner is doing on their phone. With all the cheating that’s going on these days, this feeling is completely understandable and normal. However, relationships and commitment is majorly about trust. If you’ve established that trust, then you shouldn’t be thinking about who sent that text to them or who called them the other night.
2- Not Totally Freaking Out When You Don’t See Each Other For A Few Days
Being able to have your own lives and doing your own thing is just so important. Yes experiencing things together is also very important, but too much dependence is not good. And it’s obvious that you do need some time of your own. If you both are comfortable about this time and don’t feel like it’s the end of the world; that’s good.
3- Getting Into A Fight And Knowing That The Fight Doesn’t Mean You’re Going To Break-Up
It is possible that you’d still have little arguments every now and then even after you’ve been together for a while. But if you realize that these arguments are normal and you won’t end up splitting, that is just extraordinary. It’s like you’ve crossed that skeptical phase and now you know you’ll be together; that is where you actually want to get to.
4- Going Out With Your Friends Without Being Bombarded By Texts From Your Partner
Relationships don’t mean you get to cut out your friends. Your partner has to accept your friends and has to limit his longing for talking or being with you when you’re with your friends. You can do not be hanging out with your friends and be texting your BF at the same time. And you partner can so not be texting you throughout.
5- Not Feeling The Need to Text Each Other 24/7
The goal here is to get to the point where you don’t have to hold onto your phone 24/7. Like I said before, doing your own thing is important and if your partner accepts that and you do too. Well, that’s perfect.
6- Being Alone With His/her Parents For Over 5 Minutes Without Feeling Like Running And Hiding
Getting to know your partner’s family is huge. But what’s even huge is that you can spend time alone with them without feeling awkward or weird or wanting your partner to be always there. If you establish that comfort level, you know you’ve made it.
7- Feeling Comfortable While Hanging Out And Sitting Next To Each Other (Doing Your Own Thing)
Doing your own thing and being together when you’re doing that just takes your relationship to the next level. I mean hanging out doesn’t always mean you have to be cuddling or doing something together. If you’re comfortable with doing your separate thing then you kind of accept your partner’s life and you know it’s going to last now.
8- Feeling Like You Don’t Have To Have Sex Every Time, You See Each Other
Sex is great, but sex is not the only thing that’s great. If you feel like you always have to have sex every time you guys meet, you kind of bound yourselves to a pattern. You don’t want to have a pattern – this isn’t a mathematics problem. Do different things, make every day special. Having sex is not the only thing that’ll make it special. Also, when you go about not doing it for a time, when you actually do it it’ll be awesome.
9- Knowing He/She Isn’t Going To Go Through Your Phone So Leaving It Laying Around
It’s basically about having a comfort level and trust. If that is established then jealousy won’t be there, which means fewer assumptions and much fewer problems.
10- Being Able To Appreciate Someone Else Without Them Freaking Out (And Vice Versa)
Reality check: we’re humans and attraction towards others does not vanish if you’re committed. But it doesn’t mean if you (or your partner) are checking someone out they are cheating. If they are telling you about it, then know that you’re in a pretty good place.
11- Laughing During (Or After) Sex About Something Weird AF
Sex definitely cannot be NOT weird. What I mean is that during sex things happen that might be embarrassing or weird, but laughing them off rather than feeling super awkward and running away is what you want to have.
12- Taking Care Of Your Partner When They Are Sick (And Vice Versa)
You actually reach goals when you don’t have to think twice or more about taking care of your partner when they are sick, and you’re happy about it not bounded to it. It is something you’d want to do, and it’s okay to expect that in return too.
13- Being Totally Gross Around Each Other And Feeling Comfortable About It
This indicates the extreme level of comfort and trust, and it feels amazing to have that. If you still feel awkward about farting or pooping when your partner is around or pretend like you don’t do all of that – you’re pretty much in denial and definitely in a relationship that is not even near amazing.
14- Not Wondering If They’ll Actually Happen But Still Talking About Future Plans
It’s really nice to plan for the future together like thinking about stuff you’ll be doing together years from now. But it’s so not cool to chain your partner to what he/she said they’d be doing. I mean the future is unpredictable, so live in the moment and feel good about discussing it. What happens next is something you don’t want to wonder about right now.
15- Having Inside Jokes That No One Else Understands
Having inside jokes to almost everything is just so cute. You know you two have your own personal picture of everything and a code language that only you two can understand. It kind of customizes your relationship, which is a great thing.
16- Not Even Asking If They’re Coming With You Because You Already Know They Will
Got invited to a party? A wedding? Sure thing your partner will be tagging along. It’s not like you have to go everywhere together. It’s just that he/she will be available if you want them to come. And if they don’t want to come or you don’t want to take them, you should have that understanding.
17- Their Family Assuming You’re Coming To Something Without Even Making Sure
It is just so nice when your partner’s family just assumes that you’re going to be there and will always be hanging out. Like even his/her family is getting used to you, which is just so great and gives your relationship a complete boost.
18- Binge-Watching TV Shows Together Instead Of Going Out
Socializing, dinner dates, movie nights and other stuff like that is just really romantic. But it’s not like you always have to do that. You can also spend an entire weekend in bed binging on TV shows you both like and getting cozy. Also, include snacks. It’s good to know that you don’t always have to dress up or look good, but can be in your pajamas around your partner without feeling uncomfortable at all.
19- Not Writing On Social Media About How Great Your Relationship Is and Feeling No Pressure About It
Telling the world about your relationship is not wrong, but you also don’t want to make your relationship a spectacle for everyone to see. It’s about what you have and what you feel. You don’t have to show the world and make other people jealous.
20- Even After A Long Time Of Being Together, Getting Excited Every Time You See Each Other
Even if you’ve been dating for a long time, you should always feel a little excited when you see each other. It’s a good sign. It kind of makes a statement that you’re not growing tired of each other. However, it doesn’t have to be the first date all over again; just some excitement that can keep the feels alive.
COUPLES THAT ARE LITERALLY RELATIONSHIP GOALS!
Every person on this earth is in need of a partner, whether they accept it or not. Like seriously, how do you expect us to live in this cruel world all alone? Everyone has different criteria when it comes to relationship goals. For me, the real relationship goals are found in movies, books, and TV shows. Except for Twilight (on the risk of putting my life in danger from 13-year-olds around the globe). Never Twilight.
Chuck and Blair
If I think about relationship goals, the first couple that comes to my mind is Chuck and Blair from Gossip Girl. Their start may have been bumpy, but their ending was PERFECT. Their continuous love and hate relationship attracted audiences around the globe.
They proved that all relationships come with a little bit of dysfunction. Personally, I don’t like those couples who are always ‘perfect’ and never fight. I prefer imperfect duos because they are closer to reality.
The chair even made arguing look good, and they made us realize that sometimes love comes from the most unpredicted places. Whether it was them scheming together or their iconic catch phrases, Chuck and Blair had us hooked from the beginning.
The best part about them was that they used to work as a team. Even though they used to put on a good front, but, deep down, these two were true romantics; putting their faith in destiny. Chuck would bring out Blair’s wild side, making their couple more appealing. One can’t ignore Chuck’s transformation, especially in season 5. Their relationship resulted in a dramatic change in both of their characters. Their spontaneity made us fall in love with them all over again.
Monica and Chandler
My second favorite couple is Monica and Chandler from the all-time popular show – FRIENDS. They showed us that some of the finest relationships blossom from friendship and in hard times nothing is better than having your best friend by your side.
We can’t ignore how Monica’s controlling nature and Chandler’s sarcasm is a perfect fit. Their history can’t be overlooked either; Monica had a crush on Candler which went down the hills when he called her fat. They have come a long way for sure. Even as friends they used to share secrets and sexual tension; SEVEN, SEVEN!
Chandler always seemed slightly jealous of Monica’s various suitors. They even helped each other through relationship woes. Everything changed after Ross marriage in England, and we are glad it did. Why are so amazing you ask? Well for starters, their love had a pretty great origin story.
They accomplished to make that illusive but ultimate transition of friends-to-lovers. They showed you when someone loves you; they support your dreams. They also proved the best relationships are based on mutual respect. Monica and Chandler accepted and forgave each other’s flaws. More importantly, they withstood their struggles of conception, fighting to become parents no matter what.
Nathan and Haley
Nathan and Haley started out as the classic, annoying cliché of “bad boy tricks girl to get under enemy’s skin” but ended up being our favorite couple up to date and I believe anyone who has seen One Tree Hill would agree that NALEY has got “couple goals” down to a T.
Nathan ironically started out as the villain of One Tree Hilland, despite them being actual brothers, the bane of Lucas’s existence But ended up being the BEST character in the show and also the reason girls all around the world were bawling their eyes out for having to let him go.
Myself included. (Not even going to deny it) Nathan and Haley weren’t only couple goals but also career goals. They both had very demanding and time-consuming careers but, being the amazing team that they were, somehow made it work even with a kid! They worked through all their problems and believed me there was a LOT and came out the other end stronger than before and that put them in such a high place in our hearts.
Damon and Elena
One can’t forget Damon and Elena from The Vampire Diaries when talking about goals. The impact Elena had on Damon was just mind blowing. Katherine has nothing on Elena, nothing. We all know how one side love feels like. Damon had to feel like that for almost three seasons. Just imagine THREE seasons. DAMN. If this isn’t love what is.
When they finally got together, Elena changed Damon in so many ways no one could ever imagine. ‘THE DEVIL,’ Damon basically ended up being Elena’s, Guardian Angel. And boy was he a SEXY one. Damon also had an effect on Elena. He made her feel free and safe at the same time. Elena was always thirsty for a love that consumes her and in the end, she did find it.
They make us yearn for the kind of love they have and works so hard to make our fairy tales come true too.
So, What are your relationship goals?
Submit them below in the comments. We would love to hear from you.